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but...............and it's a big BUT....
we were both sick newlyweds! haha! *rolling eyes* boy were we SICK!!!!
My sis and her boyfriend would be there practicaly 24/7 cooking and cleaning for us.
He was too weak, making food made me sick, making food made him sick,
the kitchen and bathroom made me sick.....
ugh! It got frustrating here and there, but like always, we made the best of it.
Oh yeah......it was tough......I'm not gonna lie.....at first he said the chemo wasn't so bad,
but then it kicked in like the Doc said it would, and it wasnt pretty.
I could not belive how such a good person could be going through so much pain. Why is it always the GOOD people?!
We tried to keep positive of course.
His hair falling out was a big low.
The way it works is the body starts taking care of the important stuff and it bearly, if at all, works on the little things,
like hair, your nails growing etc.
Yeah, everybody can tell you its gonna grow back, but to physicaly SEE your body falling apart is shocking.....
depressing some would say.
I still thought he was the cutest guy ever, but thats love for ya! heehee!
It was very hard for him to go out too, but he did, just for me.
I tried to make him happy and make him feel like he was o.k.
He'd get dirty looks from people cause they thought he was a skinhead,
so he HAD to wear his hip-hop labels! heehee!
Yeah, we always found something to laugh about!
The younger you are, the more they will hit up the cancer.
He had the "Platinum" version of Chemotherapy.
Two work-day weeks and a monday.
So it was 5days, 5days, monday,5days, 5days,
monday,5days, 5days, monday,5days, 5days, monday.......
for almost 4 months
Hating needles didn't help him much either.
A blood test to start and see if his body had enough
white blood cells to survive todays round.
Then we'd sit there waiting for the 3 or 4 bags to empty.
Towards the end he could not take it anymore
and would be in his chair getting those bags of chemicals pumped into him.
With tears in his eyes he'd tell me, "Mama?....I wanna go home."
Yeah.....most people who've been married 3 months
don't have to feel heartache for the other person like that.....and I felt it.
But get this.....I had to be the positive light for him.
It was heeeeella-HARD to keep that ball in my throat in,
keep the tears in and talk positive.
It made me look back....
I was with a guy who said I was "strong" for putting up with his issues?!
Nooo no no no = THIS was being strong.
THIS is putting up with something for love.
This chapter in my life is what completely changed me.
I have a real aprecciation for life and the tick-tock of time that I hear in my head.
I will either care A LOT
or pass up people without flinching when it's not worth my time, effort or care.
Next: My Business
